I had in mind to write about topical issues of public and national interest, however, just as I was about to hit the keypads of my computer, an intuitional urge loomed over me to rather write the message you find here now. It is an inspirational message for those who may feel disappointed in people who were once their best friends, confidants or colleagues, but now see themselves as rejected by them for no apparent reason.
This is not the case of friends today enemies tomorrow, but an instance of failure to realise the essence of reciprocity. In the Ghanaian society, some people may be friends but as soon as one gets elevated by virtue of their acquired higher education or immense wealth, their friendship begins to suffer or nosedive.
Very often the one with an enhanced status begins to look down upon the other, or finds a means to keep the less fortunate one aloof from him/her. The lucky one sees themselves as no longer being in the same social bracket hence the need to part ways. This is human behaviour which is unfortunately well pronounced among Ghanaians.
In the story of one good turn deserves another, an ant once saved a bird from getting shot by a hunter. A hunter found a bird chirping in the branches of a tree. He aimed his gun at it and just as he was about to pull the trigger, an ant that had crawled up the hunter’s uniform bit him on the neck. The hunter shouted ouch, lost balance and with the barrel of the gun a bit lowered but the trigger pulled, he missed the bird. The bird on hearing the boom, the sound of the discharged bullets from the gun, flew away unhurt.
On another occasion, the bird found the ant fallen into a river and was being swept downstream. The bird quickly picked a leaf from a tree and dropped it into the river. The ant climbed onto the leaf. The wind blew the leaf with the ant sitting on it onto the bank of the river. This saved the ant from drowning.
The bird has reciprocated the kindness of the bird. Each has saved the other from imminent death hence the saying, one good turn deserves another. If animals in their little wisdom do know how to reciprocate favours done to them, why don’t humans, oh fellow Ghanaians?
There is also the biblical story of Joseph in prison: – Genesis 39:1-40:23. Joseph after interpreting the dream had by Pharaoh’s chief cupbearer said to him, “Only remember me, when it is well with you, and please do me the kindness to mention me to Pharaoh, and so get me out of this house”
The cupbearer forgot completely about Joseph for years until one day Pharaoh himself had a dreadful dream and needed someone with knowledge of dreams to interpret it for him. After all his trusted men could not interpret the dream, it was then that the cupbearer remembered Joseph and mentioned him to King Pharaoh. This led to Joseph being released from prison; gained his freedom, and was restored to the higher position God had promised him since his infancy.
It is all about time. Until your time comes, there is not much that you can do. Therefore, do not be exasperated by your friend side-lining you when they get promoted to higher positions or acquire immense wealth even though, you might have helped them greatly sometime past. You only have to be positive in whatever you do, keeping to your aspirations to attain your set dreams and one day, I repeat, one day, your turn will come as they were in the cases of the ant being saved from drowning and Joseph getting released from his imprisonment.
The cupbearer forgot about Joseph when all was getting rosy with him same as some friends in better positions do purposely forget about their friends with whom they were all once hustlers.
Remember Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 “Time for Everything – There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a …”
If your friend neglects you for the simple fact that he/she has attained a much better life, just leave them alone. Wish them continuous good luck and pray and work harder that one day, it will be your turn to enjoy better life.
In October 2011 in the United Kingdom, a couple won Euromillion lottery of £101 million and made each of their twenty friends with whom they had been associating always, a millionaire by giving each person £1 million (http://www.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=10758534). They said their kind gesture could help maintain their friendship or else, the poor fellows might feel no longer worthy of socialising with the rich couple due to the automatic change in human behaviour in such circumstances. However, the nouveau millionaire couple wanted to maintain the status quo with their all time close acquaintances.
Would a Ghanaian friend do this? I doubt it! To the Ghanaian, it would become “Asetena pa ma awerefie” – When one is having a good time, they forget about their close but suffering acquaintances; they forget that there is death; they forget about the pains of others but only focus on their enjoyment and what becomes me, me and me philosophy – all for me but nothing for others.
I dedicate this instinctive write-up to all those who are currently feeling let down by their friends because these friends are now in much better positions and may not have anything doing with them. To them, I say, time changes and everything comes with time and in their own appointed time.